Are You Good With Women Or Good At Seducing Women?

The importance of reading and understanding this article cannot really be stated with mere words.

The reason is because if you do not understand the underlying principle behind this, you will flounder about aimlessly in the seduction community until you run out of gas, get frustrated, and then quit worse with women than you started.

With that said…

What exactly is the difference between someone who is “good with women” and someone who is good at seducing women?  At first glance, it looks like nothing much, they almost look like they’re the same thing.

The truth is, they could not be more different, and my question to you is simple:

What exactly are you “good with women” at?

You see, most people think that being good with women means they can make them laugh, means that they’re the type of guy that can naturally attract women, and other community-fed bullshit.

They start talking about being self-amusing, giving value to others, and other feel-good stuff that sounds great on paper and helps scam artists sell products.  All these products do is feed on the average guy’s image that there’s a ton of reasons why they’re not good with women yet.

Let me ask you… what does it actually mean to be naturally attractive to women?  Oh that’s right–when you take the root of the word natural and get NATURE, you would realize that the only requirement to be “naturally attractive” to a woman is to be MALE.

While we’re on the subject, what the hell does it even mean to “get good with women“?

Just take a look at most “pick-up artists” who are out in the wild, regardless of school of thought or anything… you’ll see that they are ALL trying to “get good with women“.

Unfortunately, all they get good at is falling for the delusion that they’re getting better at an abstract concept that doesn’t even exist in the real world.

To illustrate this point, let’s say you told your buddy a statement  like, “I’m going to go out and get good at stuff”. He would probably slap you upside your head for being an idiot.

Doesn’t that statement sound eerily similar to what most guys who try to get better with women say day in and day out?

Consider this article your therapeutic wake-up slap upside your head.

The dirty truth most guys don’t want to admit is that usually most guys who get into the community don’t ever want to get good at seducing women.  They keep claiming they want to “get good with women”, and it’s true–but their definition of “get good with women” really means getting good reactions from them.  They think that if you’re getting good reactions from a girl, she’s eventually just going to want to have sex with you.

And so the attraction-centered “seduction” community is formed, which supposedly will help you change yourself into the type of guy a girl is going to pick to have sex with.

That’s the ultimate male fantasy though isn’t it?  To attract women without ever having to face rejection.  How great would it be to avoid ever having a girl you’re attracted to thinking that you’re lame, asexual, and that she wants nothing to do with you?

This attraction-based community is commonly seen running around trying to hit state in order to say some stupid and silly ass shit to women because they think it is “alpha”, or to show that they are “indifferent”, and that it shows how “solid” they are to their pick-up bros.

The other ones feed off laughter and positive female affection from women they talk to.  They think they’re doing real great!  They tell themselves they were close to doing well with a girl and that they just needed to escalate more after a completely platonic interaction, oblivious to the fact that he quite possibly is not her sexual type at all and he just wasted 15 minutes of his life.

Do not be mistaken for a second, these guys are in it to tell themselves they “did good with women”, even if after talking to a few hundred women… they only get one or two hookups out of it.

Let’s take a look at what should be a pretty typical situation:

A guy randomly bumps into a girl in the street, a very brief conversation forms up organically.  They talk and flirt for a little bit, she’s laughing and saying things like “Oh my gosh, I’m so glad I met you today… I was kind of down but you really made my day!”

The guy feels electricity running through his body at the sound of how “pimp” he is, he knows he should probably try to instant-date her, but with things going so great, why risk a great interaction going badly?

So they part ways, the girl looks genuinely happy, the guy kicks himself a little bit for not “escalating” more and pushing it, but he’s happy because he “gave her value” and the interaction went well.  His buddy watched the whole thing down and walks over, congratulating him on how “good” he’s getting.

Let’s say the background story for this woman is that recently had her husband whom she loved passed away.  Let’s also say that because the conversation formed up organically, there was no trace of him trying to “pick her up”, and so she felt comfortable in talking with him.

There’s no way in hell she’s open to getting into a relationship or hooking up with another guy so quickly after her husband’s death, but she’s much more than happy to have a platonic, non-threatening guy regale her with funny stories and vibing with her.

Let me ask you something: what “good” came out of this for our hero, except for inflating some false sense of how good he is at getting a reaction out of a woman?  Better yet, what good did this positive reaction out of her do for him?

Because let’s twist the storyline a bit and say he escalated hard on her.  Now she looks horrified and runs away from him, telling him to get away.  Aww… the poor guy doesn’t have a pimp posh story to tell to his buddies anymore… how horrible.

He’s lost a great story to make him look good, but he gained experience in seducing a woman; regardless of how she responds to it.  He also knows that things will not work out between him and that woman, and it only took him a few minutes to find out concretely.

Two different sets of actions, two different results because of circumstance.  One he’s guaranteed to add firewood to the bonfire he has going on labelled “how pimp I am“, and the other he’s trading sure thing of a positive memory and experience for just a lame possibility of hooking up with her.

Knowing all that, is it any wonder that most guys don’t want to be good at seducing women?

Look, if you merely want to be a clown who is good at having fun with new women and meeting them in a platonic way, then sure!  You can keep trying to “get good with women”!  You can learn to give her more VALUE than a McDonald’s Extra Value Meal man!

Guess who else fits that same criteria?  Gay guys, who have arguably more fun with women and have deeper friendships and connections with them than you ever will.  Maybe a lifestyle change is in order for most aspiring pick-up artists?

If you’re straight though, I think you would have to agree that the real goal of any seduction is to actually SEDUCE the woman. (I know, it takes a genius to figure that one out right?)

Since seduction is really just enticing someone to do something they already want to secretly do as opposed to doing something they DON’T want to do, wouldn’t this be a good time for you to take personal inventory of WHAT exactly you do to try to seduce women?

Is what you’re doing helping you to seduce her?  Or are you engaging in blatant and counter-productive faggotry when you go out?

The HARDEST thing by far to do in seduction science is to GIVE UP being good at getting reactions from women, or purposely trying not to be funny or entertaining if you are naturally.

Nothing you do will EVER come close to moving a seduction forward quite like escalation.

I think that statement warrants being repeated:

NOTHING!

Not telling her funny stories, not cocky funny, not in-state bullshit, not being alpha, not being a caveman, not push pull, not NLP, not IMPRESSING her with anything that you are, none of that shit is ever going to be as effective FOR MOVING A SEDUCTION FORWARD as straightforward escalation.

My really good buddy performs improv comedy regularly as a hobby for audiences and he is one of the funniest guys I know because of it.  He told me it was one of the hardest things for him to actually “cripple” his conversations with women and to put a leash on the wild and hilarious tangents he would go off on.

He told me that to his surprise, when he switched to actively SEDUCING women instead of just merely having fun and being one of the funniest people naturally, he started sleeping with 4-5x more of the women he met while out.

To give up the things that most others think is your strongest suit is going to be one of the hardest things you ever do, but let me re-iterate that it is a necessary task if you want to truly be able to get good at seducing women.

Let’s create two hypothetical seduction situations, and you tell me which you would be more receptive to.  One you have a really famous international male celebrity who wanted to do you from behind– and the other is your average girl in every aspect who walked up to you, took your hand, and told you to follow her up to her place?

Yeah, I thought so.  Always remember that.  No matter how good you get at pushing buttons, making people laugh, having social proof, or any of that shit, none of that will EVER compare to the average guy following nature.

This is the core of the new wave of seduction.

Traditional seduction (if it can even be called that) relies on giving away every natural advantage that nature gives you.  In exchange, you are trying to fit some trendy model of what some random girl has in her mind about who she “wants”.

You are trying to logically convince her that you fit her picture of who she wants to hook up with that night.

The time-tested methods of natural attraction are rooted in the fact that nothing you can ever logically say or do will ever be more powerful than the forces of nature.

This same girl could be aghast at how such a socially repulsive guy is compelling her to mate with someone whom she doesn’t think she likes, and she knows THE ONLY THING she can do to stop this is to bait you into breaking rapport with her.

Do you see yet how trying to convince a woman’s logical brain to like you while paying little to no attention to her  raw and animalistic side is one of the most stupid endeavors you could ever set out to do?

You cannot awake a woman’s uncontrollable compulsion to mate with you at all costs by appealing to her mind of what she logically likes or not.  You can only awake it with a basic ability to keep the seductive vibe on, persistent escalation, and an ability to handle all her logical objections about how she’s not into guys like you without breaking rapport with her.

This night and day difference, my friend, is the difference between being “good with women” and being good at seducing women.